What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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