i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
So vagazzling was a success
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize