Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
