Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
and she was petting her beer can
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
