Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I accidentally burped into my bong.
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize