Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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