Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Randomize
