Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
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