There was a ginger baby in the car next to me. I almost totaled my car into the center divide.
I tried to assassinate the ginger baby
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
