I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
