Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
