Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
