Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Randomize
