Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Randomize
