Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize