I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
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