the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize