btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
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