it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
