No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
