Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Randomize