5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
