Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Randomize
