Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
