God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Randomize
