But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Randomize
