Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Randomize
