This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
i believe in u and ur pee
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
Randomize
