I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
