Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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