woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
You're like the curious george of whores
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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