He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
