it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
Randomize