Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
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