there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
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