My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
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