Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
