i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
He uses pillows to masturbate.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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