I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize
