the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
