Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
