I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
i think my mom watched the whole time
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
Randomize
