your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
