Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Randomize
