windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize