My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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