I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Randomize
