for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
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