Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Randomize
