some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Randomize
