I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Randomize
